baeksic-bitch:

baeksic-bitch:

if you ever feel bad about yourself just know that I tried to order food but i was so nervous that instead of saying “I would like 1 small pizza please” I accidentally said “I would like 1 small penis please” and the guy on the phone responded with “I only have a large is that okay” and now i have to find the nearest cliff to jump off of bYE

The catastrophe that is my life Part 2: My mom made me go in with her and help carry a bunch of pizzas she ordered for a party and when we went in the guy looked at the address number and screamed “yoO DUDE ITS THE PENIS GIRL”
confusion radiating off my mom, the entire store staring at me, workers running to the table, and the only thing going through my mind was “why couldn’t I have been born as a toothbrush”

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